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fluxscape2020-12-05 03:57 pm
un_wir_greywaren) wrote in fluxscape2020-12-05 03:57 pm
Give Me One Day Longer | AU Event | Closed
Who: Ronan Niall Lynch and Richard Gansey III
What: Waking up, end of the AU event.
When: Nov 23rd, early morning.
Where: Gansey's bed.
Warnings: Language, for sure. Possible nudity, mostly emotions. Kissing.
~*~
There had been an insanely vivid dream about doors and voices and two Ronan's who stood face to face, but had looked so very different from each other. One with hair, the other without. One warm and docile for the most part. The other venomous and cold, like a snake. He'd hated being called that, but it made sense to him now. They were both him. He could feel himself looking at the other from both sides as if he were two Ronan's, whole and broken at the same time. The voices were his own, a jumble of thoughts and memories, some less clear than others. And the doors. They'd all closed, slammed, leaving only one option.
Ronan turned away from himself, left the hair behind, the warmth and docile heart, and opened his eyes.
At first, he wasn't sure what he'd dreamed and he wasn't sure he could move even if he tried. It hadn't felt like that sort of dream at all. Real, but not his dream world. He peeked out through his eyelashes, half expecting Gansey to be gone like his hair. His head was much cooler than he remembered it being when Gansey had sifted his fingers through his curls. His heart ached and his eyes burned. He remembered everything as if he'd lived an entirely different life and then had been dropped back into this one.
The one here Niall Lynch was dead and he had no hair.
The one where he and Gansey were friends. Just friends.
He swallowed the lump in his throat and thought of everything they had said to each other, the nights spent kissing, the racing, the smiles, the touches. He didn't want to forget. He didn't want it to end. So he watched Gansey sleeping, so very close and warm, possibly still in a world where he wanted to be with Ronan. Until it occurred to him that this may be his last chance, his last kiss, his last moment with Gansey right by his side and the first thing he saw in the morning.
Gansey would wake up and realize the truth.
Ronan very carefully pushed up onto his arm, leaning over Gansey to admire his relaxed lips still kiss swollen from their last kiss, eyelashes touching his skin, hair a complete mess. So completely unguarded and unaware of the reality waiting for him when he opened his eyes.
"I love you." He spoke softly and pressed a kiss to Gansey's lips.
What: Waking up, end of the AU event.
When: Nov 23rd, early morning.
Where: Gansey's bed.
Warnings: Language, for sure. Possible nudity, mostly emotions. Kissing.
~*~
There had been an insanely vivid dream about doors and voices and two Ronan's who stood face to face, but had looked so very different from each other. One with hair, the other without. One warm and docile for the most part. The other venomous and cold, like a snake. He'd hated being called that, but it made sense to him now. They were both him. He could feel himself looking at the other from both sides as if he were two Ronan's, whole and broken at the same time. The voices were his own, a jumble of thoughts and memories, some less clear than others. And the doors. They'd all closed, slammed, leaving only one option.
Ronan turned away from himself, left the hair behind, the warmth and docile heart, and opened his eyes.
At first, he wasn't sure what he'd dreamed and he wasn't sure he could move even if he tried. It hadn't felt like that sort of dream at all. Real, but not his dream world. He peeked out through his eyelashes, half expecting Gansey to be gone like his hair. His head was much cooler than he remembered it being when Gansey had sifted his fingers through his curls. His heart ached and his eyes burned. He remembered everything as if he'd lived an entirely different life and then had been dropped back into this one.
The one here Niall Lynch was dead and he had no hair.
The one where he and Gansey were friends. Just friends.
He swallowed the lump in his throat and thought of everything they had said to each other, the nights spent kissing, the racing, the smiles, the touches. He didn't want to forget. He didn't want it to end. So he watched Gansey sleeping, so very close and warm, possibly still in a world where he wanted to be with Ronan. Until it occurred to him that this may be his last chance, his last kiss, his last moment with Gansey right by his side and the first thing he saw in the morning.
Gansey would wake up and realize the truth.
Ronan very carefully pushed up onto his arm, leaning over Gansey to admire his relaxed lips still kiss swollen from their last kiss, eyelashes touching his skin, hair a complete mess. So completely unguarded and unaware of the reality waiting for him when he opened his eyes.
"I love you." He spoke softly and pressed a kiss to Gansey's lips.
no subject
But then his feelings for Gansey had been shoved back behind the darkness and pain and whenever he thought about how much he loved Gansey he would see himself. Nothing left of the Ronan Gansey deserved.
"This week made me realized that it wasn't too late. I woke up and I remembered everything. Everything. The letters. The funeral. The way you kissed me. When I saw you standing by the Pig on the street. The look on your face when I gave you the dream Pig. The nights you sat up working on your Henrietta model. Everything."
He swallowed, voice tight with grief and the terrifying thrill of getting the chance to say it all, and gently pulled Gansey's hand closer to his lips so he could kiss it.
"I don't know what the fuck just happened to us, but it made me willing to risk everything for one last kiss. Even if it meant getting kicked out of your bed."
no subject
"I - " Gansey thought of Adam, of the happy life Ronan would have with him, and knew that he should lie. It'd be easy, he told himself. He could say something that would be a gentle denial, a nudge toward Adam and the happiness that he assumed they'd have. But he had one weakness that made him forget all his morals and the rules he'd lived by for years. Ronan Lynch.
"I know I shouldn't say this, but I've been in love with you almost since we met." He hated himself for it. Hated that this could hurt Adam, but he couldn't lie to Ronan. Ronan valued truth too much for Gansey to hide this in falsehoods. "I pushed it all aside when you moved into Monmouth." An easier marker of time than Niall's death or the funeral. "You needed me to be in another role then."
One that hadn't been necessary for the version of Gansey that lived in Gotham. One that could write silly, heartfelt letters to Ronan. That had spent hours on vid chats, hoping to see Ronan's smile. One that hadn't been forced to pretend while his heart broke over and over for the Lynch brothers and for what had been lost when Niall died.
Biting his lip when Ronan kissed his hand, he tried not to think of the easy smiles that he'd seen during the past week, smiles that he hadn't seen since Gansey first arrived in Henrietta. He'd seen something similar when Ronan had given him the dream Pig. A hint of who Ronan might be as he healed from his loss. "I don't know what happened, and I wanted that kiss. But you - you're supposed to be with Adam."